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December 27, 2013 - 17:05 PM

Love, But Not Actually: New Year's Eve for One

I'm not a huge partier. I'm young but I'm an old lady at heart. Give me something good to read, eat and get cozy in and I'm a happy camper. 


But even though I relish a good night home alone, I know that a lonely New Year's Eve can suck royal ass. Especially since everyone got together and decided that New Year's Eve is a day solely for new beginnings....of relationships. A time to make resolutions....about your relationship. The night that you just gotta have someone to kiss at midnight or else you'll be doomed to watching terrible romcoms alone for the next 365 days. 

There's just so much pressure to have the perfect New Year's Eve with the perfect person. It's such bullshit. Why worry about having someone to kiss on one specific night of the year when we worry about it pretty much most weekend nights the rest of that same year?

Waste of time.


Being single on New Year's Eve is an amazing opportunity to have a fabulous time with your closest friends or to even take up on some much needed rest and relaxation. I've got a few ideas on how you can enjoy the coming of the new year even if there's no opportunities to get laid. I mean....unless you want there to be. 

1. Throw A Singles Only Party
Get your friends to invite all the single people they know (of either sex) to your place for a big potluck party. There will be enough food, drinks and music to keep everyone happy and partying until the wee hours of the new year. Think of it like one of those 'Thank God I'm not having a baby' baby showers. Turn it into a key party. EW NOT LIKE THAT. Instead of weird sex acts, the keys will signify who has to kiss whom at midnight. Sure to get a few drunken giggles.  


2. Get Dressed to the Nines
No matter where you end up, make sure that you're the best dressed. Dust off your highest heels, glue on your bushiest lashes and make sure your outfit has glitter, sequins or sparkles. It's New Year's Eve for God's sake! Pay no mind to dress codes, wardrobe rules or anything else that keeps you from being your glitziest. Feeling glamourous will keep you in good spirits all night. Everyone mentioning how insanely hot you look won't hurt either.


3. Have A Slumber Party
Invite just a few gal pals over and make onesies mandatory. Just because the party is smaller and waaaay more casual (onesies with butt flaps are optional) doesn't mean it won't be as big of a blast. Salacious movies, delicious cocktails, manis and pedis, facials and a year's worth of dating stories that range from fun and silly to that one time when you gave a guy a blow job in a packed movie theatre because what else were you doing that night? 


4. Make Fun, Dirty Resolutions
This can happy during ANY of the parties you attend or throw. Two fun (aka hilarious and embarrassing) ideas when it comes to resolutions are: have everyone write down a seriously dirty resolution, put them all in a bowl and take turns reading them out loud. Even try to guess which one belongs to each party guest. OR take the anonymity out of the equation and have everyone say their resolution one by one. Dull resolutions like "Go to the gym" get booed and pelted with cocktail umbrellas.


If you're single this New Year's Eve don't even think about barricading yourself in your house just so you don't have to see your coupled up friends. Throw your own glamourous party and make sure it's dirty and deliciously fun.