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Look inside the Oscar gift bags, featuring vampire breast lifts, $275 toilet paper and more

Photo credit : @kimkardashian
Look inside the Oscar gift bags, featuring vampire breast lifts, $275 toilet paper and more
Because Academy Award nominees from the acting and directing categories simply can't afford to pamper themselves and splurge money on ridiculous items, the 2016 Oscar gift bags have all their weird needs covered, clocking in at a ridiculous value of $200K.

What's inside, you ask? Well, before you start feeling jealous, let us reassure you that it's all rather ridiculous... and kind of useless. 'Lucky' recipients will get:  
  • Luxury toilet paper - $275 
  • Frozen pet food - $6,000 
  • A lifetime supply of skin creams from Lizora - $31,200 
  • A Haze Dual V3 vaporizer - $249.99 
  • A vampire breast lift - $1,900
WTF is a Vampire Breast Lift? According to Cosmo, it "isn't a replacement for implants and won't double your cup size overnight, but it will reshape and round out your bust." It's based on the vampire facial made famous by Kim Kardashian in which "blood is drawn from your arm by a doctor, spun through a centrifuge to separate the platelet-rich plasma (PRP), and then reinserted back into your face." EEEEEEK.
 

Tonight on Kourtney & Kim Take Miami!!! #VampireFacial #kktm

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on


"By drawing, spinning, and reinserting blood back into the breasts," doctors can "lift up saggy boobs, increase the shape and look of cleavage, fix inverted nipples, erase stretch marks, and increase breast and nipple sensitivity." Great?
 
The only actually cool things are:
  • 10-day first class trip to Israel - $55,000
  • 15-day walking tour of Japan - $45,000
Guess Leonardo DiCaprio has something to look forward to if he loses again...