It’s been quite the year for Bruno. The adorable Austrian had a hit movie, became a fashion icon and even shoved his bare behind in Eminem’s face at the MTV Movie Awards. But even with all that exposure (pun intended), Bruno shows no signs of slowing down, and to commemorate the release of Bruno on DVD and Blu-Ray, the Austrian sensation took the time to talk to Dose.ca about his fantastical life.

How has your life changed since your film was released earlier this year?

Ich have become uber-famous in my country. Just Google “Austrian named Bruno” – ze first 14 pages are a seal who lives in Salzburg Zoo, but after zat, it’s pretty much all me. Ze great thing is, after ze success of my film, ich am now able to give something back to my friends und family – for example, ich recently paid for a statue of myself to be erected in Klagenfurt town square.

Of all the people you interviewed, who was your favourite? Who was your least favourite?

I think zat my favourite person ich have ever interviewed is Victoria Beckham. Ve all know what ein style icon she is, but ich vas blown avay by her mind. She is, like, so deep. Ve were talking about religion und she said, “Ich don’t believe in God, but ich believe in some sort of spiritual power.” It vas like ze most profound thing ich had heard since Snap told us zat rhythm vas ein dancer. My least favourite has to be Paris Hilton - she’s everything I despise in people: she dresses to get attention, she’s a real namedropper – Orlando Bloom told me zat. Und she is fame obsessed und is alvays standing next to me on ze red carpet. Alzo, she’s stingy - at parties, vhenever I’m queuing up for a goody bag, she’s always there.

How do you deal with people, especially celebrities, who get flustered around you?

Zis is something ich have had years of practice dealing with – people have always, understandably, become really over excited vhen zey are close to me. I learnt a lot of how to make people feel relaxed by vatching how Princess Diana used to do it and ich generally use her techniques, i.e. don’t speak down to people, don’t dress in an overly flashy manner und always be ready to make guys feel at ease by offering zem a blaujob.

What do you do if you get flustered or uncomfortable around someone?

Zis rarely, rarely happens. Ze last time it did vas vhen ich bumped into David Beckham in the hot tub at Simon Cowell’s Bichon Frise’s puppy shower in Monaco last summer. It vas like meeting Jesus – ze similarities are clear to see: both work mit a team of 12 ubercute guys, und both have AMAZING bodies und aren’t afraid to show zem. David actually made me feel at ease by using exactly ze same techniques I listed in your previous question.

When did you decide you wanted to be famous?

Ich never really decided; it was always obvious zat it vas something inherent in me. I mean, vhen I vas born, ich immediately climbed back inside my mother’s vageena and wouldn’t come out again until everyone in ze delivery cheered and clapped und shouted, “More! More!”

Which celebrity do you wish would fade into oblivion?

Ich am sick to death of seeing Simon Cowell’s face every single time ich switch on ze television. Enough of zis man und his talent shows! You know, ze only act that contestants of American Idol zat matter are ze ones zey perform on him in his dressing room before ze recording. Und vhy doesn’t he get some new clothes? It amazes me zat despite making more money in the past ten years zan ze whole of South America combined, ze only clothes Simon Cowell owns are a pair of jeans from a 1989 Turkish holiday and a three pack of black t-shirts from Gap Kids.

Where’s your favourite place to shop?

Vell, currently, ve’re in a recession und times are hard for me just like everyone else – so ich don’t just shop in one place, but look around for bargains. Right now, I’m very happy mit ze value for money I’ve been receiving at Neiman Marcus, Barneys of New York und Harvey Nichols in London. I’ve found zat it it is still possible to look good on a clothing budget of about $20,000.00 a veek. Ich mean, obviously you vill need a bit more zan zat if you are planning on leaving ze house.

How long do you spend getting ready every day? How do you prepare to leave the house?

Ich generally spend about 6 – 8 hours every day getting myself buffed und dressed. Again, obviously more time zan zat if I’m planning to leave ze house. To prepare to leave ze house I first check to see if zere are any paparazzi outside – obviously I can’t leave if there aren’t.

What do you wear on lazy days?

Simple, unfussy clothes, ze same as anyone else – for example today ich am wearing a yellow Adrienne Landau printed chinchilla rex rabbit newsboy hat, mit eine Cynthia Steffe blue violet velvet cadet jacket over a Cavalli back belted chunky oatmeal sweater vest on top of a Cacharel gala shirt in silver, matched mit John Varvatos stretch twill brocade sailor pants over Stella McCartney patent snakeskin monk shoes offset by Costume National elbow length leather gloves und, to accessorize, a rudrashka bead 22 carat white gold Neil Lane Infinity Pendant.

What do you think is the next big fashion trend?

Ich hope zat people are going to start taking ze green thing more seriously. Ich think zat governments should do more to encourage fashion to be environmentally freundly by making fatties pay a special green surcharge for all ze resources used to make zeir plus sizes. People may criticize me for buying over 400 new outfits every year, but ich still use up less fabric zan fatties like Vince Vaughn do buying two suits.

Which fashion trend of the past do you hope will make a comeback?

Ich would like to see more Austrian fashions back in vogue. Let’s not forget how stylish our clothes can be – you can criticize ze Nazis if you like (rightly or wrongly, let’s not get into zat debate), but you can’t deny zey did created some incredibly sexy looks mit just jackets, jodhpurs und jackboots.

What do you hope to accomplish in 2010?

Ich personally would like to get a Nobel Prize. Obama got one for Peace, vhy shouldn’t I get one for Excellence in Fashion Reporting?

Bruno is out now on DVD and Blu-Ray.

© Copyright (c) dose.ca