In news that will make every struggling writer cry out in fury and set their pages on fire, Lauren Conrad has written a novel. And not only is HarperCollins releasing it June 16, they've also signed The Hills star to write two more.
Lest you think Conrad has churned out the next Grapes of Wrath (and, really, if you think that, you should consider investing in a helmet), the novel's description shows that the 23-year-old didn't exactly dig deep into her creative well. The plot of L.A. Candy (yes, that's what it's called) revolves around a young 19-year-old girl who moves to Los Angeles and is suddenly thrust into the spotlight on her own reality show. Look out, Maya Angelou!
"The books will be loosely inspired by my own experience and are definitely influenced by my own life," Conrad wrote on her MySpace blog yesterday. "Some of the characters may symbolize people in my life, but it is in no way calling anyone out."
As a fashion student, we wonder what delightfully witty and profound prose Conrad has committed to the page. Judging by the action on The Hills, we're guessing it's probably something like this:
Laura and Audrey sat down for lunch.
"I haven't seen Jason in a while," said Audrey.
Laura stared at Audrey.
Audrey stared back.
Laura took a sip of her drink.
Audrey blinked.
Laura chewed on her salad.
Audrey chewed on her salad, too.
They both chewed and stared at each other.
Finally, Laura said: "Don't waste your time waiting to hear from someone who wouldn't wait to hear from you."
Audrey stared some more.
Do we smell a Pulitzer?
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• Lauren and Heidi Reconcile; Nobody Cares
• Lauren Conrad Makes Big Bucks for The Hills
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