Despite the non-baby-daddy's previous claims to the contrary, Janet Jackson was this week's Life & Style Magazine cover girl this week, looking all glow-y and gooey eyed under the headline "Yes, I'm Pregnant!"

Just a few weeks back, Jackson's long-time partner Jermaine Dupri shot down previous preggo rumours -- which were initially brought on by Jackson's spate of concert cancellations this fall.

Fed up with the tabloids' love of reporting non-news, however, Dupri has decided to take matters into his own hands -- and report the non-news himself. And thus, the universe should be expected to collapse onto itself some time before lunch.

Yes, like Kanye West, Lindsay Lohan and Ashlee Simpson before him, Dupri is a blogger -- and it's his mission to set the record on what didn't happen straight.

"That's why I created Global14.com," he wrote of his blog, "so when ever [you] hear s--t about me you can come right here and get the truth."

As for what truth-bombs Dupri is dropping (in All Caps, of course) among his snapshots of Brett Ratner, oompa loompa Santas and that dude who played Pedro in Napoleon Dynamite, let's take a looksee:

"AS YOU ALL KNOW JANET IS A VERY PRIVATE PERSON THE ONLY REASON YOU SEE HER
AS MUCH AS YOU DO ON MY YOUTUBE VLOG IS BECAUSE OF ME LOL.

"BUT I HEAR YALL AND YOUR QUESTIONS. SO HEAR YOU HAVE IT…
NO SHE IS NOT PREGNANT AND YES WE’RE STILL TOGETHER."

For all the latest news in things that totally aren't happening, check back to Global14.com.

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